Brayin Candy

The Sinking of the Hiltanic

The $250 Million Hiltanic has hit an Iceberg and is heading for the cold dark depths. Like all oversized steamships, this top heavy cruise liner was slow to turn as the deck hands ignored the icy straits. Whenever she attempts to lighten the junk filled hold, another Hsu drops. No matter how many coats of paint they put on this tub, you can’t cover the fact this sloop’s time has passed. She is a coal fired Tramp Steamer in a Nuclear Navy. In an act of desperation she launches her Cruising Missile only to have it explode amidships. America would rather have this rust bucket scuttled at sea rather than make port in the District of Corruption.

After her debate debacle, her coronation facade dropped like a two year facelift. She reminded the Country of clintonspeak as we universally reached for the Advil. Spending another eight years of breaking down sentence structure sounds like torture. Does America need to define "is" or "sex" again? The compass is turning south as Obama is beginning to look like a scuba tank in the watery depths.

After a month of bumbling around in her blackened Captain’s Quarters she banged her shins in her drunken stupor while she reaches into her closet to grab her personal destruction guns. To counter her rank debating skills, she gets caught with dirty hands in a Plant Stand. Then she makes the pettiest attacks on her opponent about his craving the Presidency his entire life, hello, to putting a dirty Campaign Finance Hsu on his foot. Finally Captain Bligh drags out Admiral Hornblower. That is like McCales Navy transporting a shipment of Nitroglycerin. You know it’s going to explode, you just don’t know on whom or when.

So now she is so despeRat she is willing to be in the dark damp shadow of her "husband" again? She brings him in to Anchor her team, then that anchor crashes through the hull. The biggest problem for Leona Helmsley Clinton, is once people get to know her they realize she is Leona w/o the charm or personal skills. It’s not their fault since Harpy clinton doesn’t like them either. She is forced to paint on those goofy smiles and pretend she likes them to get their votes, but her eyes say the opposite. Slick Willie could charm the panties off a nun, while HilaryCare can give an Eskimo frostbite.

Her Iceberg is her legacy. She believes she can fool all the people all the time. America remembers the co-clinton regime and are not ready to go back. You know you have problems if you’re too corrupt for her Party. It was easy to hide behind a WH full of attorneys and war room spokesmen with a common enemy, yet it isn’t nearly as easy while on stage. BJ could always use the Gee Shucks happy puppy foil to get out of trouble, while HilaryCare looks like an exploding volcano.

The Hiltanic who everyone said was unsinkable is filling w/water. With all the fanfare at the launching, nobody bothered to notice her obvious flaws. All the poll watchers in PravdABDNCBS told us how popular she was and how America hated President Bush when the truth is just the opposite. During the co-clinton years we were all sold on polls cooked worse than Enron’s Books. Fact is, America always knew they were crooks yet it was easier to let them stay then suffer through a gummit meltdown.

The Country is comfortable with an honest and honorable man in office. They may not be happy with all the details of President Bush’ ideas, but nobody is going to accuse him of avoiding big issues or following polls. We remember the co-clinton admin & Star Wars bar with all the corruption which torpedoed the pair. From the minute they entered the WH people were being shot, burned, planes crashed and Jack booted Troopers were kicking in doors and those were the good days. This is the Iceberg she can’t navigate and has put a deep gash in her side sending the unsinkable Hiltanic to Davy Jones’ Locker.

Pray for W and Our Victory Troops